Badluck and depression

First, a very short backstory to this site:

About 1AM one night a couple of months ago, I was browsing the web searching for personal stories and reflections about depression. I was supposed to take an early train the very next day to visit my relatives “back home” over christmas. When the websites in my native tongue didn’t deliver any good sites, I turned to the ones written in English. I was able to find a couple of sites worthy of my interest, but most of them was tossed aside. In pretty much all of the blogs and websites I found, the texts were short and not at all very reflective. In between images of clouds with motivational texts printed on them, cliches are fighting for attention with the ads from Google AdSense.

I can’t be the only one that gets frustrated hearing tips and tricks on how to improve my mental health and what pitfalls to steer away from to avoid getting thrown even deeper into the black hole that is depression. I know all the pitfalls, I know all the tricks to “be happy” and I’ve delivered them all to friends who’ve hit a hard time in life. I hate the lecturing tone these are delivered with, and I know I’ve been guilty of given the lectures with the same annoying tone to others.

This is my (newest) attempt to battle MY depression, and I will take a rather clinical approach to it. I will describe what I’m feeling and my perspective on things, rather than trying to cheer everyone else up. Don’t be surprised if the texts are a bit distant, that is how I like to describe feelings. To clarify: I will write some texts about how I experience depression, and hopefully without being all touchy-feely about it.

So, come along on a rather skeptical tour of the dark inner workings of a depressed mind!